So Tired

[enter giant yawn here]. i think i could sleep for a hundred million years.

Why are all the guys on American Idol so weird looking this year? Not a single cute one -- all odd! What's up with dread-boy with the puppy-dog eyes.

That's all I got.

Honest(ly) random thoughts

Life is confusing. Seriously. I wish I were superwoman, or maybe just a bit more like some of my friends (lisa). I want to work full time, have a baby, get a dual masters degree (=two masters in the same time as one) keep my house clean and still have time to blog and shop. But I don't think I can do it all. Heck, I don't even blog or shop as much as I want. So, instead of trying any or all I spend my time worrying about the what ifs and wondering how to keep a marriage alive in the midst of it all. =-/I'm sure worrying and what it ifs are the more painful than trying any and failing.

The book I'm reading In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day (Have I mentioned that it's a great book?) says that we need to be good stewards of our opportunities. Also one of the core values of our church (the author = my new pastor) is to work like it depends on you and pray like it depends on God. Easier said than done. Which opportunity am I to be a steward of? You know honestly, I think I can handle work + baby or work + school. But maybe the opportunity here is to try and do it all, working as hard as I can, praying hard as I can and then in the end it will all work out.

So the math would be:
me+Kevin+work+baby = easy, requiring God, but able to attempt on my own
me+Kevin+work+school = easy, requiring god, but able to attempt on my own
me+Kevin+work+baby+school=only possible by God's grace and help.
Ok, maybe the answers there Maybe I just need to not be a chicken, maybe I need to be a lion chaser - but, damn, the math is easier than living it out day by day. ARG! I feel like if I were called to go to Africa, sacrifice all that I have here, and surrender to martyrdom I'd pack my bags, kiss my husband, pet the princess Ellie, and jump across the ocean - why is it the "simple" things of work, baby, and school that frightens me? Hmm...

On a complete tangent, I really love igoogle. It's my favorite, especially now that they have a gadget that makes ladybugs crawl on your screen (and you can move them) AND I can play duck hunt!

While I'm tangenting (is that a word? Who cares!) I'm so stinken excited about going to Atlanta this weekend it's not even funny. I miss my friends something awful and it will be so great to see prego people and PT. As if that's not enough goodness packed in one weekend we're going to Myrtle Beach (never been) where we get to hang out with Kevin's cousin, Eric (best man in our wedding) and his wife, adorable daughter Maddie and brand spanking new baby Emily. I think that if we add anything else fun to the weekend I might explode!

One last tangent - if I have to think or deal with Minnesota anymore I may snap - it's too much. If you don't know, please don't ask me to explain because seriously, close to snapping here. Don't push the envelope people. It's dangerous. #=-(

Pray for me. Pray for Kevin too, poor guy -- all this mental anguish/excitement and all he wants to do is fix it and he can't.

This message will self destruct in five minutes.
Run.

Princess Ellie the Pooper

Meet Eleanor Elizabeth Kip Colon Thornton, better known to the rest of the world as Ellie, though she has been given many another nick name (El Diablo, The runaway, Princess, Pooper...). Ellie likes to establish that she is the ruler of her world. In the morning, she demands a walk in the bitter cold, not caring that it's 5:30 in the morning. She scratches and barks, demanding that her humans react. So...out we go. But the Princess must find the perfect spot. Not just any pile of dirt will do for her - oh no. She must find the perfect spot, the most delicate leaf, the spot in the middle of a thorn bush.

That's not enough; no scrap of food is safe. If the demanding, sweat, puppy eyes don't win out then the puddle of drool slowly collecting beneath her will. Once she's had her fill of your food, she positions the pillows on the coach just so. She must rest her head on a pillow - silly human - you expect her to be without a pillow?? And it doesn't just stop at pillows. She'll drag a blanket to wear it suits her.

The world is her toy - she doesn't care if it's your shoe, or hat, or chapstick. It's hers. She is ruler of the universe.

Aside from her only child syndrome and princess-ness she really is a funny, cuddly little mutt. She's quick to growl and play ruff and even quicker to kiss and make up. (And if you’re a boy, she's quick to make out - careful her tongue will end up in your mouth.) She's also a sweaty-pie who likes to cuddle with me and make sure that I know I'm loved.

This is princess Ellie.

Well Duh

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02/14/nyregion/14slay.html?scp=2&sq=psychiatrist%20stabbing&st=nyt

So while I was waiting for my lunch to heat up -Microwavable as usual - i saw the above linked article in the NY Times.

For those of you who are like me and won't take the time to click the link, here's a summary:
Late at night two psychiatrists are working in their office. A man comes in and asks to see one of them. He's busy with another patient. So, the man sits, makes small talk and then goes into the other psychiatrist’s office instead. While in there he cracks and stabs the woman to death. Meanwhile the other psychiatrist has heard the screams of his colleague and rushes in - so he then gets stabbed.

Where's the well duh part? Here it comes my friends, "A day later, the police said they did not know the motive for the frenzied attack ..."

DUH - why can't we just say because the killer was CRAZY! When did we complicate things so much that we have ruled out the obvious?

Freezing Rain

Whoops....so much for posting everyday. I'm a slacker. Can someone please explain to me the purpose of freezing rain? Why can't it just snow? Stupid ice everywhere!

Yeah so...

So...I haven't blogged in awhile. No really good excuses. I'm lazy.
So...Today I felt like puking on my shoes all day - NOT MUCH FUN
So...Today I heard a sermon that kicked my butt - hopefully I'll let God change my heart, heal it, and do something cool
So...we're moving...AGAIN. But hopeully not for a while after that.
So...when we move I can go from getting up at 5:30 to getting up at 6:30 - SWEAT!
So...the wind was so bad here today it blew over a LIGHT POLL - CRAZY
So...I got nothing else.

PACT

Who knew that PACT actually stands for:Politically Incorrect
Agency
Co-founders of the
Tactless Society

So this week has been filled with social blunders at work. The first faux-pas was on a staff meeting on Thursday. My boss asked the group if anyone had any exciting news. To everyone's surprise one of our quieter staff members said, "Actually, I'm pregnant" Everyone was shocked and congratulations filled the room, UNTIL...my boss asked "was it planned? I mean were you surprised by an accident or did you mean to get pregnant." I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped. To clarify the immensity of this blunder, this co-worker of mine HARDLY EVER TALKS. It's not like her and my boss has this joking relationship, where it might, possibly, in some sick-way be acceptable for him to ask her that. She responded with a quick "yes it was planned." and the rest of us tried to move the conversation along.

Faux-pas number 2 is a combination but since it affects the same person I thought I'd lump them together. This week the finance division had a new staff member join. I swear he's the identical twin of David Bruce. Now, from day one I knew he was gay. He didn't even hide it - PINK POLKA DOT UMBRELLA and pictures of his "Kids" two English bulldogs. He even talks about his partner. No big shocker - right?

Well apparently someone didn't get the message. New guy was introduced at a group meeting where a co-worker was taking notes. When co-worker sent out the notes she put that "His wife works for USAID" actually it's not his wife, it's his partner: Steve. I'm not really sure how you mix that up, but he and I laughed it off. THEN THE BIGGEST BLUNDER OF ALL TIME:

When someone new starts working at PACT Human Resources sends out that person's job description so that everyone knows what to expect of newbie. Well...the HR director sent an email that she thought had his job description as an attachment. But, what she actually sent was his employment letter THAT PUBLISHED HIS SALARY!!! I guess the only good news is that it was only sent to managers and department heads that had access to that information anyways - BUT STILL!! Poor guy, now everyone knows how much he makes AND thinks he's straight and married.

I think I'll be offering everyone a class one socially acceptable statements and questions. Good Lord!

Bad Day

You know it's a bad day at work when you hide in a storage closet to cry.

I think they were handing out numbers for people to get in line and harass me or point out mistakes. Hooray!

Rainbows

It's been two days since I posted. Don't worry you didn't miss much.

Saturday was Kevin's birthday and we went to Ocen City, MD. It's like Daytona, Panama City, and St Augustine all rolled into one. Oh, wait and that it was in the freaking 30s!!! It was fun though. We hung out with two of his co-workers, had a really great dinner, played pool, and I had a little too much to drink.

Sunday Kevin and his co-workers had a meet to coach/attend. It was interesting because it wasn't USAG (USA Gymnastics - i'm picking up the lingo) and it was lower level gymnastics so there weren't a lot of really cool gynmastics you think of when you watch it on tv. It makes you appreciate the process, i guess. Then everyone came back to our house and we watched the GIANTS STOMP THE PATRIOTS!! I mean we, simply watched the superbowl.

Mixed with all of that was joy of figuring out this thing called marriage. Most would call it a fight. Oh well.

Today I woke up sad, tired, a little overwhelmed by life, and frustrated. But as i was walking up to the Metro I noticed a bright rainbow in the midst of the dull, gray clouds that have perpetually hung overhead since we moved here. Made me think of God's promise to not destroy the earth because of the circumstances humanity causes. Which then made me think of Isaiah 42:

"A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice; he will not falter or be discouraged till he establishes justice on earth. In his law the islands will put their hope. This is what God the LORD says— he who created the heavens and stretched them out, who spread out the earth and all that comes out of it, who gives breath to its people, and life to those who walk on it: "I, the LORD, have called you in righteousness; I will take hold of your hand. I will keep you and will make you to be a covenant for the people and a light for the Gentiles, to open eyes that are blind, to free captives from prison and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness. I am the LORD; that is my name! I will not give my glory to another or my praise to idols. See, the former things have taken place, and new things I declare; before they spring into being I announce them to you."

That is, God has a plan and it's not to harm us. Even if it hurts. He wants freedom for us --AND he wants His glory, which means that sometimes he puts us in circumstances we can't handle just so he can rescue us and then get the glory.

That made my day.

I feel blah

I really have nothing to write about today. It was a blah day. It rained really hard all day and then it was cold. Didn't Maryland get the memo that the weather is supposed to be like Florida anywhere I live?

All I want to do is sleep. Is that bad?